Wednesday, November 22, 2017

what do want me to say?

so what do you want me to do?
i am not sure what you think....
it's time to leave this time behind
and look forward to life without the way it was

so what do you want me to say?
i would risk it all just to stay here....
would you do the same....
and be the fool....lose everything.

my life now is disjointed --- i am alone
without hope except for the One who truly loves me.
so what would you want me to do?
risk it all just to say hello....

may be you aren't thinking or writing to be cool.
i am not sure what you want.
i know that i will not risk it all...
the end is here.

Sunday, May 21, 2017


the world is foolishness
with what we all cherish.
the whims and desires
the lusts and fires.

social needs and communication
a sensual conflagration
of foolishness exhibition
and narcissistic ambition.

i want to get off this ride
and destroy all that is me.
i want to let your spirit take over
and my foolish spirit subside.

Tuesday, March 14, 2017

At Last, Goodbye

At last an ending to this story
Secrets and no one will know
No one can see...
A path way covered by the evening snow.

I have been waiting for a day
That will never come.
I have been waiting for a time
When I thought you were going to be the one.

Now I know I cannot go on.
I must leave you behind.
A useless effort to think that it would be so.

A landscape without color
My days ahead seem awash in grey.
I will make it through
Without your love and care.

Monday, February 20, 2017

i can't say goodbye

somehow it will be right
barely holding on to Faith
show me the way, Lord
i cannot say goodbye.

even when everything looks bad
i ask and plead that you make a way
for us to still be there for each other
i don't know what more to say.

You hold the Universe in Your Hands
You know the next step, the next verse.
You hold our next breath...
So please don't take this away unless it's not Your Will.
thank you Lord.

Thursday, February 16, 2017


would you forgive me?
if so, please let me know
an answer, a hello.
i did not want to run away

the sun is shining over the clouds
the light reflecting.
i did not want to go.
it was a choice i could not ignore.

i will come back
if you will let me, lord
this world is hurtful
and people do not care

please say you will take me back
let me know tomorrow
i will be waiting for a sign
so i can come back to you.

Sunday, February 12, 2017

An Anthem of Reality

we held onto things we could never keep
while life moved on we lived a lie
i thought that it could be done.
reality is not pretty or the fairy tale end.

so know the end in sight
the lives we shattered.
i held onto slipping sand
and life is never kind to us

so i hope you know
i never meant for this to end
but sometimes life is not how we think it should be
i am sorry for the bitterness and tears.

i know that its over
i can never go back to how it was
you know, the times were lovely
but now the evening in my life is here.

Friday, February 10, 2017

I don't care anymore

i dont care anymore.
about your feelings or what you think.
i dont care anymore
about anything.

i am numb to the pain.
i do not think it is worth the risk.
self preservation at all costs
suicide prevention hotline.

i dont care anymore
about what it was and what will it be
i feel nothing but this empty heart
where once there was a spark.

so if you see me passing by
dont say a word
dont even want you to know i exist
i want to fade into the background.